Thinking about thinking

The brain is a pattern making machine. It doesn't take long for something we once had to do consciously, to become an unconscious program.

Just think about how good people can become at learning the smoking program, it does not take long for people who smoke, to do this activity without conscious choice.

Most of us have the driving program so well installed - we can talk and drive, listen to music and drive... And I know many of you will have had the experience of arriving at a destination with no actual recollection of the journey. It doesn't take long for something we once had to do 'consciously' to become automatic or unconscious.

Anxious and stressful thinking, although not done consciously or with intention, in many ways, can become habitual or automatic too.

The ways we think, can become an un-conscious pattern.

To break habitual ways of thinking, we need to first bring attention and awareness into the mix.

We need to make conscious - what has previously been unconscious, and when we do this, we can notice an emotion and then become curious; “If my emotions are like the audience to my thoughts, do I have to be the victim here? What if, I can get curious and just press PAUSE. Then play a different script”?

• What was the initial thought inside, that then created this spiral of feeling?

• What is it that I'm thinking, that is creating this feeling....

• Is that thought absolutely TRUE?

• How do I feel, when I think it IS true?

• How would I feel if that thought were NOT absolute truth, if I could flip it 360 degrees, would I feel differently?

• What is the content of the movie in my mind, what am I hearing inside my mind, what mental pictures am I creating?

Can you to come up with a thought that does NOT involve; mental imagery, mental dialogue, an imagined taste, smell, touch (kinesthetic) or sound? Simply noticing that we are playing thoughts that involve all our senses, most of our waking lives is a first step to understanding how we 'code' our inner data.

We can then notice if the thoughts are creating stories of our future, perhaps (if you are anxious) rehearsing all the worst-case situations; or are we playing ‘replays’ of events or situations already in the past?

How much time is your mind actually here, NOW?

How amazing that we have the ability to actually THINK, about thinking, to get curious enough to want to know how thoughts happen, what shapes them and how they shape our emotions, beliefs, ideas, actions and body chemistry!

How amazing is it, that when we close our eyes and imagine an apple.. the same neurocircuitry lights up, as when we see an actual apple!?

This is why we can actually grow muscle fibers by visualizing lifting weights!

The same rule applies when we habitually flex the ‘thought muscles’ of anxiety and stress, when we rehearse all the things we don’t want, all the worst-case situations, creating the biochemistry of stress, (we can even create the chemistry of stress with our thoughts while we are sitting on a beach, on holiday in the sun). Just one stressful thought, and all of a sudden, the heart rate increases, our shoulders and jaw might tense, our stomachs may get upset... as blood rushes to the limbs to prepare us to fight, run and freeze in shut down.

With awareness we can begin to ask ourselves questions about our inner processing.

Take any comment that hurt your feelings as an example;

• Is it possible, that another person, might not react in the same way as me?

• Is MY ‘mind’ (perception) the cause of the ‘effect’ I’m noticing?

• If three different people react in three different ways to the same comment, is it the person who is saying it at fault for saying the thing, or is it my perception showing me that there is something inside that I can work through?

When noticing a problem...

• What am I hearing in my mind right now, is it even MY voice?

• What’s the picture I’m seeing in my mind's eye?

If I consciously choose to visualize something different, while slowing my breath, relaxing my jaw and sitting up straight.. do I feel any different, NOW?

What’s everything in the world, that’s NOT that problem?

Polyvagal Theory

The vagus nerve is a bundle of neurons connecting the brain to many of the major organs, with nerves running both from the organs to the brain, and brain to the organs. Among other things, the vagus helps regulate our heart rate, breathing, and appetite.

The polyvagal theory was developed by Stephen Porges, who was the founding director of the Traumatic Stress Research Consortium at Indiana University, early in the 1990s.

His research into the vagus nerve seemed to show a link between our evolved autonomic nervous system and our social behavior, behavioral problems, and psychiatric disorders.

According to Porges, the autonomic nervous system has three primary states, and suggests that trauma leads to shifts in our dominant autonomic state. (Trauma, not necessarily being 'what happens to us', but what 'happens INSIDE of us, as a result of what happens to us').

• Ventral vagal state- A calm and connected state that supports social engagement, emotional regulation and effective problem-solving

• Sympathetic state - Includes the “fight or flight” response associated with fear and anxiety that helps individuals respond (though not always appropriately) to perceived threats

• Dorsal vagal state - Connected with immobilization and shutdown responses, potentially leading to feelings of dissociation, numbness, and disconnection

When in a state of threat, our nervous system fails to regulate bodily organ systems or manage social relationships successfully, and our priorities change. We move away from growth, restoration, health, and forming connections with others to survival and protection mode.

When we start to notice, track, and listen to our nervous systems, we lose the feelings of shame and hopelessness associated with believing we are at fault, freeing us to navigate through complex or challenging environments with curiosity and more self-compassion.

According to Siegel (1999), it is a state of physiological and emotional regulation (ventral vagal) where we can effectively cope with stressors and engage in social interactions. Social connection, and connection with ourselves, is a key indicator of wellbeing.

Activating the Ventral Vagal

Here a few quick and easy ways to activate the Ventral Vagal, calm and connected state.

We know we need to move into 'ventral' when we notice we have spent too much time stressed or anxious (in sympathetic), or when we might feel shutdown, frozen and helpless (dorsal state).

To start with, simply bring attention to your jaw and the muscles of your face and neck.

Notice any tension, and EXADURATE for a few seconds, really tense those muscles that were already tense as you inhale (you can even imagine those areas like solids blocks of ice).

Then breathe out, and as you do, imagine those blocks of ice melting with a wave of relaxation.

Bring your attention to your jaw and mouth, place your tongue on the roof of your mouth, and drop your jaw so it's more relaxed than you thought it could be.

Alternate nostril breathing

1. Sit down in a comfortable position with your spine straight.

2. Bring awareness to your breath for a few cycles.

3. Start doing a few cycles of deep breathing.

4. At the end of the last exhalation, use the right thumb to gently seal the right nostril.

5. Inhale through the left nostril counting up to 4.

6. As you reach the top of the inhale, release the thumb and seal the left nostril with your right ring finger.

7. Exhale through the right nostril.

8. Keep the right nostril open and inhale.

9. As you reach the top of the inhale, release the ring finger and seal the right nostril with your right thumb.

10. Exhale through the left.

11. Repeat this cycle for at least 5 times

Square Breathing

1. Sit down in a comfortable position with your spine straight.

2. Bring awareness to your breath for a few cycles.

3. Start doing a few cycles of deep breathing.

4. Imagine a square.

5. As you inhale, count up to 4 imagining that with each count you go up one side of the square.

6. Hold your breath for 4 counts as you imagine going through the top of the square.

7. Exhale counting up to 4 as you picture going down the other side of the square.

8. Hold your breath for 4 counts as you imagine going through the base of the square.

9. Repeat this cycle for a few minutes

Shake it up!

This is used to induce comfort in the midst of anxiety and the sympathetic nervous system activation.

Animals often shake themselves to release the excess energy produced from the stress response.

In this case, this technique allows your body to connect with the trembling sensation produced by a stressful event and enable your system to settle.

We humans have domesticated ourselves to a point where we are often too self-conscious (or even unaware that we have an 'excess charge' trapped inside). So, we don't allow our bodies to notice, (or complete), some of these natural cycles of the healthy nervous system.

Depending on your office... some of you might turn this into a morning tea activity, some might just get weird looks? This can be one to save for when you get home - AND it could be a great one to teach anxious kids!

Steps:

1. Find a space where you feel comfortable and safe for shaking.

2. You can do this by either lying on the floor or standing up.

3. Think to the recent moment that was pivotal in activating your agitation and stress response. Let the energy, or change of that situation move through your body as you shake your legs and feet.

4. Shake the energy charge off by shaking your arms and hands.

5. It might be helpful to imagine that you are shaking off the sand from your body after going to the beach.

6. Explore any other movements that might feel good for your body.

7. Come back to a resting position, sitting or lying down.

8. Use a soothing breathing technique from above, to bring balance.

Hannah Milward

Wellbeing Practitioner / Registered Nurse

Author Hannah Milward RN, Integrative Wellbeing Practitioner, NLP, Hypnotherapy, Resilience Coach. Hannah has been working in the health and wellbeing field for over 15 years. Her current focus is helping people become empowered and resilient, working through chronic pain, anxiety, stress, triggers, depression and trauma. She integrates tools from NLP, clinical hypnotherapy, somatic therapy and more traditional talk therapies to help clients create lasting changes for the better.

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